The Best Jokes on Christmas Crackers


Office party season is almost over, and the family season starts. Both have in common
loads of booze, festive food and Christmas crackers. The first time I saw crackers here in London, I was intrigued by their shape. The small explosion was a little surprising too. It seems like it is a traditional Christmas must-have in UK. What about other countries?

For those who don´t know what a Christmas Cracker is, it basically looks like this:

The Best Jokes on Christmas Crackers

Two people pull its ends until it cracks open. You then hear a small explosion, and one of the players ends up with a small gift and a joke. The joke is similar to the pic on top of this entry.

The Best Jokes on Christmas Crackers

Some of the one-liners are actually quite good. The type of humour is absurd, generally. It can simply be a pun, enough to make us giggle. Here are some of the best that I´ve heard lately. Have you got any? Then, share them with us!

What do you call a blind reindeer?
No eye deer.

Why did the ghost not go to the party?
Because, he had no one to go with.

What does Santa suffer from when he gets into a chimney?
Claustrophobia.

What do you call a man with brown paper trousers?
Russell.

What’s furry and minty?
A polo bear.

What cereals do cats like?
Mince crispies.

Why did the turkey join the band?
Because, he had drumsticks.

Who hides in the bakery at Christmas?
A mince spy.

What do you get when you cross a lion with a snowman?
Frostbite.

What do sharks eat?
Fish and ships.

A Londoner from Afar

About A Londoner from Afar

Cheese & choc lover, marketer and linguist who would like to explore and share those aspects that still have the power to make her stay in the amazingly vibrant city of London after nearly 10 years.
This entry was posted in Holidays, Miscellaneous and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

8 Responses to The Best Jokes on Christmas Crackers

  1. Awful – Brilliant ! what about the crap gifts?!

    Like

  2. bookmole says:

    I didn’t realise crackers were a UK thing. I thought they were universal. Though, with jokes like those, it’s for the best that we keep them to ourselves!

    Like

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